Hi Gary, I read your message and seen that there wasn't many comments on there. This is my first time posting, I have been struggling with my mental health as well, feeling the ups and downs of life and not knowing what going to happen round the corner. which then in turn gave me anxiety which i experience early in the year.
I read that your turning to drink and illegal highs, this is only a cover say a mask that your using to disguise really what is happening, my dad was an alcoholic and unfortunately died when i was 16 years old due to him severing with depression.
I was turning to drink as it was covering the pain and anxiety i was having, but i found the gym and yoga, i know its having that mental ability to get out of the house, but i first started with walking and just putting some headphones on and listening to music, clearing my head for that 30 minutes. as i was gaining confidence that when i join. Dont get me wrong im far from cured but them down moments i put into something like the gym, walk or yoga.
I hope you find that inner energy instead yourself, to know that your worth more than drink and the drugs