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Isolation making me fall out of love with my husband

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Isolation making me fall out of love with my husband

Postby elcr » Wed Jan 20, 2021 3:15 pm

I feel awful. This isolation has been tougher then ever. It’s making me become a horrible person.

My husband has been working from home since the 1st isolation and continues too, with no end in sight for when he will return to work. Of course I’m lucky that he is still able to work, the same as I am, but I feel like I’m falling out of love with him.

My brain is making me reevaluate if I even should have married him in the first place.
I came out of a bad 1st marriage, had a really bad divorce & luckily had my new husband there to help me through it.
He has been a saint, but I think I rushed into getting married again, and with being together 24:7, even the small things are driving me crazy.

Am I the only one who feels like their going crazy being stuck in... or should I be truly worried that I made an awful mistake 3 years ago and now am only realising!

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Joined: Mon Mar 29, 2021 10:59 pm

Re: Isolation making me fall out of love with my husband

Postby depressedfairy » Mon Mar 29, 2021 11:07 pm

Hi, if its any consolation I've been with my partner 12 years this year, and the lockdown has definitely had a negative effect on our relationship. I've been questioning the same thing, should I have ever got with him in the first place? I'm a meat eater and he's a veggie which makes cooking difficult but he respects my decision to eat meat and I admire him for being a veggie, so we are on a mutual agreement there.. but yes lockdown with our partners 24/7 I think is driving everyone stir crazy, he even suggested we need a break the other day!
You aren't alone, so maybe do your best to give it time and see, if you really think he is the one! X

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Joined: Mon Mar 22, 2021 3:40 pm

Re: Isolation making me fall out of love with my husband

Postby beatricemom » Tue Mar 30, 2021 1:02 pm

On the contrary, isolation improved our relationship with my husband. We have been married for 8 years and it was just the lack of attention from each other that strained our relationship. And thanks to the quarantine, after 8 years of living together, we learned a lot of interesting things about each other. The question here is not that you made the wrong choice, but how to find common ground. We experimented with cooking during quarantine. My husband became interested in creating furniture, and I was engaged in reading and collecting diamond mosaics. Both listened to audiobooks a lot and shared their impressions. it even happened that they listened to the same book, watched the same films. Everything is in your hands - you are looking for flaws or trying to get out of this situation without destroying each other morally.

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Joined: Sat Nov 21, 2020 12:00 pm

Re: Isolation making me fall out of love with my husband

Postby epitaph » Thu Apr 08, 2021 5:51 pm

Hello elcr and depressedfairy,

Does the following help at all ?

Sorry to start by stating the blindingly obvious but these are not normal times. Lockdown 1, 2 and now 3 coupled to the slow release to some form of normality has taken away so many of the things that we used to be able to do and took so readily for granted, (meeting friends, meals out, a coffee with a friend, activities conducted without ones partner - aka the fun stuff). Weeks have turned into months and still it goes on, (albeit there is so much more hope in 2021, than the dark days of 2020). At the same time we have been forced to spend a lot more time with a small number of people, without the enrichment and release of our everyday frustrations as well as distractions...

Is there any wonder then or just natural that as individuals we are not quite the same as we once were and as result find ourselves dwelling on previous decisions or questioning things that we would not normally do ? As well as being less tolerant and irritated by things that would not normally get to us ? All of which is the same for the other people around us who may re-act better or worse than ourselves...

At this point I can feel myself thinking a bottle of Red might help - :)
But knowing that there will be better times ahead.

Take Care!

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