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22 Nov 2020 , by Caroline

It’s OK to admit you’re struggling, especially to yourself

I think it’s ok to say that this year, no matter who we are, or where we are, or what our background is, we are finding things tough. They may not be the same things, but in some way or another things for all of us have been a struggle this year.

I have tried so hard not to admit that though to myself and I’ve only just realised that. Outwardly, when having a chat we tend to say “Aren’t these crazy times?” or “I know, things are just so awful these days”. But inwardly, I have tried so hard to fight against how I’m really feeling. That, yes, I am struggling with it all.

I suppose even though I know it doesn’t work, I have been trying to fight admitting these feelings to myself because I thought if I keep dismissing them they will eventually go away. And I have tried everything. Drinking plenty of water, exercising, eating healthy, eating junk to feel better (really didn’t help. Just made me feel really bloated, over full and yuk. I wouldn’t recommend it!) listening to positive podcasts, music. But something was still missing.

Listen to your feelings

It may sound daft but I was scared to admit to myself that I was struggling. I was scared that if I did, the feelings of struggling would almost consume me. Like I was giving into it. But it didn’t consume me. It made me feel really proper tired, so for the first time in ages I didn’t fight my feelings. I listened to them, and had an early night.

I’ve woken up the next day, not consumed, but instead by an overwhelming feeling of relief that I have actually been honest with me and have listened to myself.

Paying real attention to how you are feeling, and what is best for you is not selfish, not self obsessed or self indulgent. It is a necessity. We need to take real honest care of ourselves, so we are able to be the best version for us and we can be there for others.

So yes, these times are a real struggle, they are tough buts it’s OK to admit it. It’s going to be OK.

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