Sirhugo thanks so much for taking the time to read my story and reply. The people on here are so supportive but to also have the view of someone who is a sufferer themselves adds even more weight. I'm glad you have said that you and no doubt others like you recognise that pushing away loved ones is not good and you can choose not to do it. It gives me hope that not all sufferers are the same.
I do agree with you that he might not be worth it and one day I might have to come to that conclusion, but I'm not ready to do that just yet. I just need him to tell me what this is all about, give me some idea of when he thinks he will get past this episode and what I should do. I just need that background info. I can handle it for example if he says leave me be for a month. It's a long distance relationship, I would miss the daily banter (I do already) but if there was an end in sight I would mark off the days and hope for better days to come and things to be how they were when we were together. It's the not knowing that is the most difficult part.
He was upfront with me from the first time we met - me not so much, altho I did say I had health problems and was ill health retired, but that I am more well now than I have been since my DX, my health always comes up when I meet someone new because I am single and not working here. I don't do lies. I did tell him about the M.E. before he came over again, and I told him I like people to get to know me first rather than look at me as a diagnosis and I am sure that applies to people with MH problems as well ... they will want to meet and be at the best they can be. Perfectly understandable but we owe each other the decency to warn of any potential problems that might come up. As a person with a chronic illness I understand that.
I'm in this one for the long haul, I'm stubborn, I've fought my own illness, I can support someone else with theirs within reason and provided it doesn't make me ill again myself, I waited long enough for someone to make me feel as good as he did so I can wait a bit longer.