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voices in my head

For when you're feeling particularly vulnerable...
PureFrustr8d
Posts: 591
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:21 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby PureFrustr8d » Thu Mar 29, 2018 12:24 pm

I understand. I hope you have a nice GP.

To change your life you have to be prepared to change your thoughts.

If you keep thinking the same way, how do you expect anything to improve?

I can come up with reasons too for not doing things but then I need to also take responsibility for the life I'm living...cut off from others, not doing hobbies, not travelling etc The memories won't go away whether you are at home or outside. If you don't want these things to leave you miserable you have to be brave and face the consequences of triggers one day at a time.

That's not to say that you won't have periods where you fall but at least life is sprinkled with some moments that you have conquered your fears. You manage to go to see your GP, I image that isn't easy but you do it. That's the attitude that will help you to do other things you want to do. A little at a time.

Best Wishes,
Peace

stephsept
Posts: 22
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2018 9:56 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby stephsept » Mon Apr 02, 2018 9:33 pm

I know that but to me i'm keeping myself safe by not putting myself in danger.

I can't cope with the outside world,too any triggers,too much pain,too many memories,smells,sounds,people who look like him,phrases i hear,thing i just want to forget.

I know i'm stopping myself from healing but i'm not able to face the past.

PureFrustr8d
Posts: 591
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:21 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby PureFrustr8d » Thu Apr 05, 2018 2:38 pm

Hi stephsept,

I understand. It's very debilitating.

You say you are not able to face the past but it reads like you are stuck in the past. You aren't avoiding to face your past, you are avoiding to live. You are keeping yourself safe by doing what's familiar to you even though it causes you harm. You recognise it too. What you are saying makes perfect sense to me.

I use to use the word 'heal' before but I've gone off it. I prefer to think of it as transforming...going through a transformation (on account of the fact that the damage cannot be undone). How do you heal from these things anyway? They never leave you. The wound is always there. That's why I started thinking of it in a different way. I'm not the same person I was before each crap that happened.

Other than my son, we have a cat and dog at home who help me. My dog has made going out a far better experience. I'd recommend keeping a pet if you don't have any already.

Peace

stephsept
Posts: 22
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2018 9:56 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby stephsept » Wed Apr 11, 2018 2:03 pm

I have my son and my 4 cats, want more but hes put his foot down and said he's not living with a crazy cat lady.

Went out for a walk today, it was only around the block but i done it on my own, baby steps. Didn't talk to anyone though but i went out, so i guess that's 1 to me and nil to my head.

PureFrustr8d
Posts: 591
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:21 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby PureFrustr8d » Tue Apr 17, 2018 2:12 pm

Hey steph, that's excellent news :D

I would have written earlier but I've just not been able to sorry.

I hope you've been out a few more times since posting.

That's super you have 4 furry friends.

Best wishes,
Peace

stephsept
Posts: 22
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2018 9:56 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby stephsept » Wed Apr 18, 2018 7:12 pm

Don't worry i know we are all trying to face our own demons and there are times you have to think of yourself.

Finding it hard again at the moment, April is a bad month for me with birthdays and anniversaries of people i have lost in my life, espically my dad, who's birthday it will be tomorrow, then the end of the month the anniversary of his death, so not a good time for me at the moment, just feeling really down and at the end.

PureFrustr8d
Posts: 591
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:21 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby PureFrustr8d » Wed Apr 18, 2018 8:52 pm

It really wasn't a question of taking time for myself, I was all over the place for 5 days. Since Monday I'm feeling different. I can't say I'm ok but I am not as I was during those 5 days so that's something.

There is a name for what you just written. It's called 'the anniversary effect'.

Here are a couple of links that might be of help to you:

https://themighty.com/2017/02/anniversa ... epression/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog ... -reactions

The 2nd link has some tips.

Please take care, remember to show yourself compassion. Your bound to feel particularly low during this time, I pray as the days pass that the feeling lightens. Tell someone if you think you might have difficulty keeping yourself safe ok.

Best wishes,
Peace

stephsept
Posts: 22
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2018 9:56 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby stephsept » Thu Apr 26, 2018 12:06 pm

Thanks for the two links, they helped a bit.

Have spent the last week here in body only, my mind has shut down, worse day yet to come, 4 days and counting.

Still remember the day so clearly the phone call at work saying my dad had hours left, the drive to the hospital only remembering passing one car, even though there were many but it's the hearse that's always in my mind of that day. Seeing him in the bed a fraction of the man i know, that horrible yellow colour holding his hand as he took his last breath, then just going numb people talking around me but hearing nothing.

Even now on the rare occasions i go to funerals all i can hear in my head is my dads service, not the one i'm attending.

Mind shuts down now to try and stop the loss, the pain

stephsept
Posts: 22
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2018 9:56 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby stephsept » Thu May 03, 2018 7:32 pm

Just put the razor down, now looking at my tablets.

Why won't my head voices shut up, i've had enough of them need peace and quiet !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

amandasantos
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Mar 12, 2018 4:50 pm

Re: voices in my head

Postby amandasantos » Thu May 17, 2018 10:13 pm

my thoughts are with you, cant imagine how frustrating must be hearing voices, but believe when i tell you.. you are in control of your thoughts and action and you can choose to fight back, the negative forces pray on those who are strong but think they are weak so they purposely make you feel worse about yourself but deep down you are stronger than them.. you are loved, you are ALIVE, you still feel in your heart hope, and they do not! my therapist has helped me alot in believing in myself that i have the strength and courage to stick up for myself and not let these voices or negative thought consume my mind because if they can get in then they can get out the same way. so stay positive and pray whether u believe in god or not, pray for strength pray for peace in your mind and pray they will leave you alone ... the best way to in is to push thru with love and confidence ... "they" (voices) hate that they dont like to feel love and compassion it weakens them, i believe in you and i may not know you i will fight this with you subconsciously with my heart.


xxxx


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