hi forever, and welcome to the forum.
this is desperately sad. i'm sorry i don't know anything of this psychology assessment you mention and which you seem to have to pay an awful lot of money for. if you're no longer under the supervision of the mental health team, then this surely represents progress and i would have thought there was some hope of getting your children back. i'm sorry i don't know what else to say. hopefully someone else more knowledgeable in these matters will come along soon with some helpful advice.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.