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Rick's Journal

For poetry, art, writing, music - your own or others'
rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Tue Aug 29, 2017 6:41 am

-Past-

The past is history. It has happened and we cannot change it. Therefore, we shouldn't be dwelling or focusing on the past. Why spend so much time on something we cannot change regardless how hard we work at it? The past can be a complicated matter and, for many people, it can be difficult escaping from it.

With the past, we are usually dealing with the regrets and the what ifs. We have regrets due to doing or not doing something. We like to think about what we could've done to change all of that. We post those what ifs wondering if things could've been different with the situation of us picking a different decision at the time. In the end, all of this does nothing but bring us more pain.

Yes, we might have good memory from back then. When I was at the lowest point of my life, I thought about my childhood. I thought about the carefree lifestyle where, outside of school and whatever activities my parents planned for me, I can just have fun. I didn't have any responsibilities and can just focus on having fun the best I can. Those days seems wonderful compared to now.

Yet, I'm not longer a kid anymore. I'm an adult with responsibilities and priorities in life. Comparing the past with the present, I feel pain. I realize I had wasted so much time that I could've used to make my life better. I could've gained new skills to make myself a better resume. Dwelling on the past only emphasizes the terrible present we have now which, as a result, makes us more miserable.

The past is important but we mustn't dwell on it. When we are busy dwelling on it, we cannot focus on the present. We cannot walk forward if we are looking back. Sure, we can learn to walk backwards but, by the time we mastered this ability, we would've lost more time in the process that we won't be getting back.

We can look at our past from time to time but it should never occupy our focus. Life won't wait up for us while we dwell in our history. We must resist the urge and keep pushing forward. The past may call on us but we should cover our ears and walk towards the future. We cannot ever be happy if we cannot move on from our past.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Thu Aug 31, 2017 6:06 am

-Past 2-

We still need to look at our past from time to time despite the necessity of not dwelling on it. The past holds many lessons because, in our lives, everything happen for a reason and part of our job is to figure out why it happened to us and not others. We might have regrets like not finishing school, giving up on a dream or not asking a girl out at school.

What we must do is inspect our past to see what happened and why it happened. However, we must make sure not let regrets cause fear in us. If something happened, we shouldn't let it haunt us for the rest of our lives. For example, a bad experience with a girl shouldn't stop us from giving other girls a chance. The lessons we're learning aren't how to run away from things that hurt us.

We need to learn from our mistakes and really figure out why something happened. As much as we want to do it, we mustn't blame others. All of our mistakes are caused by ourselves due to poor judgement or simply lack of experience. We must understand that we will make mistakes in life and shouldn't be ashamed of it. The moment we let these mistakes create fear within ourselves, we'd lose our way forward.

There will be times where revisiting the past is tough. It's never easy going through some of the memories we'd rather leave behind. Don't dwell on it but know that these memories usually have the most to teach us. I had troubles revisiting my suicidal attempt but, by going through it and analyzing it properly, I realized that I was lonely and the silence was what drove me to that decision. This realization is partly why I started doing these journals.

For some of us, we must also defeat the demons from the past. We need to overcome a certain fear or conclude something for good. We need to move on so we can focus on the present and future. When we don't tie up the loose ends, these things can haunt us later in life. Given that we are mortals, we have limited time and it's better invested in the present and future than the future.

Never dwell on the past. Learn the lessons they offer you and move on. Each of these lessons you learn and master will get you further in life. The experience can be painful but, the more pain they cause you, the greater the lesson they can teach you. Don't shy from the pain that's temporary. If you are trapped in the past, then the pain will be permanent until you overcome it.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Fri Sep 01, 2017 5:01 am

-Present-

Out of the past, present and future, I believe the present is the most important. People generally think future is the most vital and underestimate what present can offer to us. I'll use myself as an example. I started pursuing my dream in hopes of helping those with mental illnesses. When I had the idea, I could've easily dream on it and keep planning until the right moment shows up.

Instead, I decided to act and dive in head first. Yes, I am inexperienced and have much to learn. Yet, I'm taking the first step which seems so difficulty for so many people. Now, this dream, like so many others, is called a dream because it seems so impossible that accomplishing would still appear like a dream. As a result, something this big takes time and I should start now so it can become a reality sooner rather than later.

Why not now? People keep dreaming and thinking when they hesitate to start now. The present is something we have direct control over. We cannot control our past and we have indirect control over the future. The present is when changes happen and, with the right changes, we can chart a much brighter future than the one we saw before.

Changes also don't happen overnight. Habits, especially the good ones, take time to develop. If you start your change now, then it can be developed much sooner and then you can move forward a step at a time. When people wonder when's the best time to do something, I honestly believe now. Procrastination takes away our most valuable resource, time.

The present is the most important. You can have all the best ideas but, unless you take action now, those ideas will remain ideas. Now is the best time to do anything and all it requires is you getting up to do it. When we can take advantage of our present, we are making use of time to pursue what truly matters to us.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Fri Sep 01, 2017 8:26 pm

-Future-

The future is important as it's the destination I talked about. While I did say that journey is more important than destination, we cannot really have a journey without one. Maybe you and a friend decided to go somewhere on a day off but neither of you have an idea where. Therefore, you two wander aimlessly and, if you're lucky, you might arrive some place that gives you an enjoyable experience. Otherwise, you'd waste that day with hardly anything done other than a lengthy car ride.

Regardless of what your journey might be, you must first determine your destination. The further you set the destination, the longer and the more rewarding the journey will be. What's great about setting the destination is you have a lot of freedom regarding when you want to reach it. This could be tomorrow, next week, next month, etc....

As you are picking the when, you might be tempted to choose a realistic timeline. I honestly believe that it never hurts to push the boundaries. Take a bit more risk and aim higher. For a business, this might be getting more products done than what was anticipated without the quality suffering. As we push this boundary, we are actually pushing ourselves to be better and better. As long as we keep improving, we'll be able to reach newer heights.

The future also contains many surprises, some good and some bad. Know that those good surprises could change your life forever. You might find a great friend or find that other half you've been searching for. You might also encounter a person who will play a big role in getting you closer to making your dream a reality. The incredible thing about life is you never know how an encounter could change your life. It either makes it better or teaches you a valuable lesson you won't ever forget.

People without a destination often wonder if there's more to life. That's why you must have something you want. We all have things we desire but it's up to us to work for it. The future will be in the present for a split second before it becomes the past. Therefore, you must prepare so that, when it arrives, you can take advantage of it. Maintain a positive mindset and you'll get more during the journey that is basically preparing you for the future you have envisioned.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Sun Sep 03, 2017 5:45 am

-Future 2-

There are two "cons" regarding the future. The first con sees people who fear the future and its uncertainty. They might have heard certain things on the news like the predictions of the economy crashing. These things make people take what they believe is the safe and conservative path which often sees them giving up on their dreams or doing things that eliminates all the progress they made towards their dream.

People should never let fear govern their actions because they more than likely pick choices they'd regret later. While you don't know what will happen, the uncertainty also allows you to write out your future. They essentially provide you with blank pages which you can fill in with what you want. When fear is controlling you, other people will fill in those pages and naturally those people don't know what's best for you.

The second con is people dreaming and planning all their lives but never actually take action. For instance, a person wanting to be a professional singer might often dream about a large stage with numerous loyal fans cheering for him or her. This person probably had goals for each year planned out which is solid. However, this person made the mistake of focusing too much time on dreaming and planning while not putting close to enough time in putting everything into action.

I learned in life that most of our plans won't go according to plan so we need to adapt. Regardless how many contingency plans we have in place, life have surprises we would never see coming. Having a destination is good. So is have a rough plan on how you'll get there. Just remember that the details for the plans will change as you move forward and adapt properly.

We don't need to worry about how we would make a dream come true. Take the first step that so many people are afraid to take. Once you're on this journey, you will find the how along the way. I didn't know how to turn my life around until I did door to door sales. This was probably the last thing I expected but it has taught me what I had to do next. For everyone else, there are ways life teaches us the how as long as we go on the journey leading to our dream.

The future is great when we have goals and dreams. Simply remember that dreams isn't enough. We must put in work and action to make dreams come dream. The present is when we take action while our future is what gives us a general direction. Meanwhile, the past contains the lessons we must learn to move closer to that future we always wanted.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Mon Sep 04, 2017 5:58 am

-Pain-

Pain comes in many forms and sizes. Some are physical pain and others are mental pain. More often than not, you can go to doctor regarding a physical pain and determine what's causing it. For mental pain, it's usually tougher and, sadly, fewer are willing to see doctors due to the stigma we have towards mental illnesses.

People have different ways to dealing with ways and some are just horrible approaches. These approaches causes more problems where facing problems head on yields much better results. One of these approaches is denial where people deny there was anything wrong and/or the pain doesn't actually exist. Such denial can only do so much to keep the pain at bay. I like to see this as erecting a wall that has cracks forming. It stops the pain initially but, as time passes, the cracks grow bigger and the pain returns.

The denial makes you refusing to see a problem exist whether it's physical or mental. This actually makes you vulnerable since, when we don't see problems, we don't seek solutions. For example, someone might feel some minor pain and assumed they were just tired. A few years later, they discovered they had cancer which could've been taken care of with ease when they first felt the pain. We underestimate what something can do until it's so big we can no longer ignore it.

When we don't see the problems, we won't ever find solution and others cannot help you either. When we are dealing with mental illnesses, that's a challenge we face. We don't know who to turn to but, by keeping the problems within us, it eats us from within. Our primal part of our brain teaches us to avoid pain. This was a great approach when we are fleeing from predators. Given how complicated our brains are, fleeing isn't the best solution anymore.

Denial, basically a form of fleeing, won't stop the pain. It can buy us time so we can better prepare for it but that's about it. Know the many problems had to be dealt head on or the pain will haunt us the rest of our lives. We shouldn't pay a greater price simply due to our reluctance to deal with a problem when it was still manageable.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Tue Sep 05, 2017 5:38 am

-Pain 2-

Another way people deal with pain is distraction. Many people believe that, if they are distracted, the pain wouldn't be as bad. These distractions come in many different forms. One example might be a failed relationship forced a person to work extra hours. Since this person is so busy working, he or she wouldn't have time to let his or her mind wander to the relationship that had ended in failure.

Another distraction could be drugs. We all know drugs are terrible but, for some people, they feel their pain is so bad that the consequences of taking drugs is minor compared to what they're dealing with. They also have the belief they can stop taking drugs when the pain is gone. To them, drugs are a temporary solution which they could end whenever they want.

The third distraction I want to mention is food. For many of us, we have our comfort food which aren't always necessarily healthy food. Despite knowing this, eating these food helps make us at ease and can keep the pain at bay, even momentarily. Whenever the pain returns, people can get into the habit of returning to eating to keep it at bay longer.

All three forms of distractions mentioned above all have negative outcomes as a result. Working extra means your body gets less rest, especially when you are pushing yourself to exhaustion to not let your mind wander to the pain. We can handle these sort of workload when we are young but our body suffers and we'll see the consequences later in life when our body complains.

Drugs are dangerous due to how destructive they are. They can destroy so many lives and willpower alone isn't normally enough to quit them. For those we resort to drugs, they are playing a dangerous game where they are trading the pain for something that's far worse. As for food, obesity leads to heart problems and other health issues so this isn't any better.

Denial and distractions don't help as neither approach really aims to resolve the issue at the root. One is refusing to acknowledge there's a problem while the other is running away from it. I believe that tackling pain, no matter how much it hurts and how much we fear it, is the best approach. I'll discuss this in the next entry.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Wed Sep 06, 2017 5:39 am

-Pain 3-

Running from pain isn't the solution and the only way to overcome it to face it head on. This approach isn't easy but it's necessary if we hope to leave it in the past and move towards the future. After all, running only lets the pain haunt you from time to time while it's never really gone. Constantly feeling pain is certainly not a way we want as we progress through life.

Pain reminds us of things and teaches us a lesson. When we were kids and get burned on the stove, we learn not to touch it when it's hot. Pain at times is the best way we can learn valuable lessons we need to make progress in life. Pain never happens without a reason so we need to figure out why it's there. When we figure it out, then we use this bit of knowledge to understand what we can obtain from it.

Pain can tell us that we made poor friends or got into a bad relationship. We will make mistakes in life and many of these mistakes will cause pain. Some pain are temporary and will go away on their own while other pain will remain until you deal with it. The latter is what's often holding people back as they cannot let go of a past thinking that letting go would make the pain worse.

In our lives, pain is very much like failure. Nobody wants it but it's necessary in our lives. If we are too busy trying to avoid all pain, we'd never have anything accomplished in life. We'd let fear grip us so fully that we lost control of our lives. When pain does come into our lives, there are various responses which includes suicide. It's our response that determines how our future would be shaped up.

To tap into our full potential, we must accept that pain and failure will happen. They are there to make us tougher so we'd be ready for bigger challenges in life. We learned how to ride a bike this way so we most certainly can accomplish anything when we are older, wiser and stronger. Remember that the greatest people in history had to endure the greatest pain. Therefore, you are meant for greatness if you are suffering incredible amount of pain!

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Thu Sep 07, 2017 6:06 am

-Sharing-

From a very young age, we were taught to share with classmates and friends. Somewhere along the way, some of us changed. I know I changed where I don't want to share and would rather keep everything to myself. I never figured out why but I don't even want other people touching my stuff and became much more selfish.

This situation was worsened when I wanted more stuff. When I was a kid, my parents weren't wealthy at all so I often watch with envy as other kids have lots of things that I have none of. Essentially, I wanted to keep all that I had and wanted more for myself. Looking back, I feel ashamed of this mentality after what I experienced recently in life as an adult.

The more selfish and self centered I am, the less I'm willing to share whether it's laughter or money. As a result, I was never really happy since I lost track what truly mattered. After all, we gain things by giving and sharing is the first step towards giving. When I refuse to share, I, while didn't realizing at the time, was going down a spiral where, no matter how much I got, I won't ever be happy or fulfilled.

After experiencing the lowest points of my life, I learned there's more than just wanting more. For my channel, I just wanted to share my stories. Despite it being ordinary stories with failures many people experience, I hope this could give people hope and courage when they are facing their own struggles in life. When we can change lives by sharing, we get things that no amount of money can buy. After all, we learn we are living more than just ourselves by touching other people's lives.

rick-amateur
Posts: 84
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:43 am

Re: Rick's Journal

Postby rick-amateur » Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:24 am

-Sharing 2-

Sharing is so important and we need to teach kids when they were young. Classic example of sharing that comes to mind is two kids with a single toy. Sharing will see both kids getting a chance to play with the toy but neither of them will have sole control. Essentially, the kids must learn to compromise since only one toy is available for both of them.

The kids learn that they must make sacrifices in the process which is roughly how the world works. We cannot get all the good stuff and compromises have to be made. Two parties might have to work together to both benefit from the cooperation. We might get less than we wanted but we get something rather than failing by ourselves and gain nothing at all.

We have all seen selfish and self-centered people in our lives. They want everything to themselves thinking that the world owes them. How willing are you to become these people's friend? Quite unlikely since such a one-sided situation is nothing people want to be in. At the very least, people want friends who will have their back when required. You won't get any of that from a selfish person.

If a person, from a young age, was spoiled by parents, then he/she will expect to get anything he/she desires. The real world, sadly, doesn't work that way. The issues lies in that, as a person get older, it much harder to learn how to share. Changing these sorts of mentality isn't easy for adults and, the longer a person delays, the worse it gets for the person's life. After all, life does have to teach some of us the hard way if we don't learn early on.

Something else gained from sharing is learning how to cope with disappointment. If people learn to compromise, they learn that they cannot have everything to themselves. Sacrifices had to be made so both sides can benefit. This can lead to some disappointment since a person might want the whole thing. If kids were taught at a young age that disappointments will happen and can respond maturely, they will get through life much easier.


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