You don't have to go through this alone.

[BlackRose]

Really hope you have a try with the options I suggested. Talk on here. Please keep safe. Takf care. BlackRose

[brainsprain]

Do you think families can become so dysfunctional that all the members of the family have mental health problems?
Do you think we can ever escape it?
Im running short on hope.

[BurningBlue]

I think the former is possible and the latter, if not certain, is highly probable. Hope this adds a bit of hope x

[brainsprain]

Thank you BB.
I grew up with mental illness,developed it myself,
live with the knowledge that a close family member committed suicide,
my mother has consistently talked about killing herself from I was a child,
now as an oap she talks daily about suicide(her gp suggested diazepam),
and now another close family member seems to be going the same way.

[sunnydays]

I feel quite alone at the moment.

I am finding it difficult distinguishing between well-meaning friends and people just enjoying my suffering.

Am I turning skitzophrenic? Or is this clarity?

It's easy to slip abuse, both emotional and psychological, under the label of skitzophrenia.. but it doesn't seem possible that people would victimise me to the extent that I'm thinking they are.

My parents are very controlling and not helpful at all, and don't seem to care at all that I'm in this pit of suffering that they've helped create. They actually seem jealous of whatever happiness I have worked to achieve.

At the moment I'm at the stage where I think strangers in the street have something worthwhile to say about my life, and know something I don't. This can't be rational thinking, can it?

However the friends I have don't seem my friends anymore, were they ever my friends? I don't know if they were, honestly.

Where is this clarity that I need to find.

I think it's both at the same time - I have these paranoia issues, and at the same time, people use that to take advantage of me. Maybe that's clarity.

But how do I get through this and find better friends who are not going to take advantage of me?

[judithj]

that sounds difficult - do you think that writing down your thoughts would be helpful in distinguishing what is real and what isn't? that way you can question what's real and what's not. talking to your gp would be helpful too. also, ask yourself why people would enjoy your suffering - if anyone is, then they need help. you don't have to cope with this alone, hugs, Judith xxx

[tania]

I can highly relate to you sunnydays. When I was a teenager I didn't understand what was normal and what wasn't. I'd think that I was really going crazy, and that there was something wrong with me. It probably has a lot to do with upbringing. Stability is always needed in that case, and when it's not then you find yourself a tad lost along the way as you get older.

Even now... like this morning, I sat in the park for ages wondering what the meaning of life was, or whether I should walk out in front of car, I kept telling myself that these were not normal thoughts, but somehow they FELT normal. Does that make sense?

I sometimes wonder if I actually make sense to myself, let alone others!!

[schalon3802]

Hi,
I'm new to this never posted on anything before, feels kind of strange being here and finally admitting threre's something wrong other than to myself.

it's nice realizing your not alone with how you feel. Most people don't get it, or understand how low you can feel or scared. life with a mental illness can be so lonely even when you do have other people around.

I've had social anxiety and avoidant personality since I was in my teens I was in an adolescent psychiatric unit for a year when I was 17 due to depression fear of people and inability to communicate. After years of bullying family problems, sexual abuse for 3 years from boyfriend I became disconnected, suicidal and hated everything I was. although not now suicidal I struggle with everyday life highs and lows, I never socialize, I feel like a freak, not normal, no confidence or selfesteem I know I need help to get my life on track but the very essence of social anxiety is being afraid of going out and being with people, so how do you get around seeing a dr when you are terrified to go and know even if you did when you get there your so scared you say nothing?

[judithj]

hi and welcome. have you considered writing down how you feel and what you're worried about? you could then take that into your gp and use it to explain what's going on. you might try keeping a diary longterm to help you develop coping strategies, hugs, Judith xxx

[tania]

I've known my doctor for years, and even I was so scared of what he might think or that he would just simply say that I didn't need any medication. Thankfully, being the experienced doctor he is, I didn't need to say much (due to him seeing my mum who's depressed too) and he sorted it out for me.

But I understand your concern. Any doctor worthy of their qualifications will be nice and sympathetic. Either write it down, or have a little speech ready. You made sound a bit strange going in there and blurting it all out but I did, and it worked!

And welcome xxx