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Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
aethalides
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Dec 12, 2019 2:31 pm

Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby aethalides » Thu Dec 12, 2019 4:35 pm

Hi

This is my first post with Sane.

I have been suffering from depression and loneliness for a long time now. I have had issues with drug misuse and am currently self-harming.

Tomorrow is a Christmas party from work. I work from home nowadays but I have worked for the company for a dozen years and have always felt isolated and treated as a pariah even when working in the office.

Now I have said I would go and have even bought a fancy t-shirt to wear but I feel very anxious about going.

I am not well versed in being social and usually end up as a wall fixture. On top of that, I can't even touch alcohol to 'loosen up' and 'get merry'
So I'm afraid about going and feeling excluded again or being made fun of but at the same time I am feeling lonely and self-harming and I could do with some human interaction.

Just don't know what to do or how to motivate me for going

eeyore
Posts: 182
Joined: Tue Nov 05, 2019 2:34 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby eeyore » Thu Dec 12, 2019 4:52 pm

Hi. Don't go if you don't want to your mh is far more important than some stupid work do. Don't put yourself through something like a party if you don't feel up to it. Relax at home and do something you like doing listening to music or watching the TV. If I was you and didn't want to go I wouldn't . I'm thinking of you and stay safe.

lobster
Posts: 131
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2012 7:04 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby lobster » Thu Dec 12, 2019 9:21 pm

Hi

It’s weighing up the human need for some interaction with the need to self protect.

In case it’s if any help a lot of people find these gatherings difficult / awful. Even those who look at ease.

You say you have bought yourself a fancy top for it which makes me think you’d quite like to go.

If you did feel like you could manage it maybe just go for a short while. Be with people for a manageable time then excuse yourself saying you need to be somewhere.

eeyore
Posts: 182
Joined: Tue Nov 05, 2019 2:34 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby eeyore » Thu Dec 12, 2019 10:21 pm

But then if you say you have to be somewhere what do you say if they ask where are you going that can make it difficult because then people will only want to know where you're going.

lobster
Posts: 131
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2012 7:04 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby lobster » Fri Dec 13, 2019 12:31 am

Just be vague, they won’t know, ‘I’ve got to be somewhere/ I’ve promised to help a friend out’ ‘ I have some errands to run before tomorrow, have a good Christmas, bye.’ Sort of thing.

Good luck.

aethalides
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Dec 12, 2019 2:31 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby aethalides » Fri Dec 13, 2019 12:05 pm

Thanks everyone

11AM and I'm still undecided. I want to go and I don't want to go.

I'm anxious about going and anxious about not going

aethalides
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Dec 12, 2019 2:31 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby aethalides » Fri Dec 13, 2019 1:37 pm

One bonus would be getting a free meal and £30 pound drink money...

User avatar
so sad
Posts: 173
Joined: Tue Mar 11, 2008 1:28 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby so sad » Fri Dec 13, 2019 4:11 pm

Have you gone?

I totally understand the fight between feeling the need to go and not wanting to. I didn't go this year.

hope you're OK/

M

aethalides
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Dec 12, 2019 2:31 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby aethalides » Fri Dec 13, 2019 5:41 pm

not yet it starts at 7pm

lobster
Posts: 131
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2012 7:04 pm

Re: Christmas do with colleagues anxiety

Postby lobster » Fri Dec 13, 2019 8:08 pm

Hello

Just wondering what you decided to do?

Best wishes

Lobster

:)


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