Sorry to hear about how you're feeling - but it's a good sign if you're able to talk about how you feel!
I'm glad that you acknowledge and are able to appreciate what you have - a place to stay, food to eat, clothes to wear. These material things are the basic needs in our lives, so they are important as a foundation for our wellbeing.
However, you also mention things you have that you don't want. If you don't want them, what can you do to get rid of them from your life? Bonus points if you can find someone else who could find use of those things - you rid yourself of something you don't like, while giving someone else something they will like!
When we are feeling down, I find it's really helpful to look at what we have and appreciate what we have. It gives us grounding, and something to build on top of. It sounds like you're doing it already, which is great! Now, you have to take that foundation as a springboard to achieve. If these things are secured, you could look for a job that caters for your needs specifically - of course it will be hard, but the financial security will help build that foundation, as well as open some opportunities for more activities that make you happy! Or, you could look to set up as a freelancer/private worker, which gives you more control over your working hours etc.
You're doing much better than you give yourself credit for! Channel your inner gladiator, and keep battling hard through the hardships in life!x
Much love <3