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SANE Support Forum


For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
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Joined: Thu Jan 04, 2018 12:17 am


Postby paige96 » Thu Jan 04, 2018 12:24 am

Hi everyone,
I'm having a really hard time at the moment.
My mother is an alcoholic, and causes so much distress in my life, its really wearing me down. I don't see my father very regularly - he lives far away, and I just constantly feel really alone.
I have quite a few friends, but they aren't really close friends, I feel like I can't open up to people very well. Even when I'm surrounded by so many people at uni, and I go out lots, I still feel alone, and like I can't talk to anyone about the problems in my life. I also suffer from anxiety.
Does anyone have any advice/help to make me feel slightly better?

Posts: 460
Joined: Sun Nov 05, 2017 6:10 pm

Re: Loneliness

Postby teamn » Sat Jan 06, 2018 1:28 am


what an awful position to be in, to be surrounded by so many people but feel alone and what sounds like disconnected from those around you. you say your friend are not close, is this why you dont share stuff with them?

Sounds like you need a listening ear though, have yo tried a councellor. or just trying to offload t Samaritans. by getting out most of what you feel, you may then be able to share snippets with your friends, and slowly slowly build a deeper connection and then this may reduce the feeling of lonliness.

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Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2017 4:12 pm

Re: Loneliness

Postby rsxo » Sat Jan 06, 2018 12:55 pm

Hi paige96,


Sorry to hear about what you're going through. It must be really tough to deal with one parent who's alcoholic, while the other is so far away - I'm beginning to understand why you feel so alone.

Feeling alone amongst a crowd of people is more common than you'd think. Many people report feeling alone in a large group of people due to the less attentive, intimate interaction with others. Some people also feel this when the group of people they are with doesn't feel like the right fit for them. As a personal example, I feel alone when surrounded by a crowd of rowdy teens drinking, because it's not something I do myself, enjoy or even agree with - thus, I don't feel that sense of belonging, and so I feel alone.

Being open is really difficult, especially with people you don't know well. It seems like there is a link between struggling to be open, and struggling to make close friends. The reason is that closer friendships require being open and vulnerable. Obviously, you don't want to be telling someone everything straight away. It can easily start with not responding to the question, "How are you?", with "I'm fine" if you're not feeling good. If you're not feeling good when someone asks you, don't be afraid to talk about how you feel. That's the starting block for building closer relationshipsx

Much love <3
RSxo <3

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