I am new here and just found this website through NHS website for depression.
This is my back story....
I first encountered problems with low mood in around October 2015 when I sought the assistance of a student counsellor. After my initial appointment, I didn't have time to go back again, and to an extent things improved in some ways.
I've always used alcohol as a crutch, together with binge eating.
In December 2016, after a few bad months of feeling low and anxious, I drank too much at a work party and embarrassed myself. That led to me giving up alcohol for January 2017 and thinking I might have had a drinking problem.
Nevertheless I started drinking again and in May 2017 had a near panic attack. After this, I went to the Dr and was prescribed sertraline. I was also referred to a cbt programme. However at the initial appointment, they picked up on my alcohol issues and referred me to an alcohol abuse service. Through one thing or another I haven't accessed the service, though I have twice given up drinking since this time (and twice relapsed after little over a month). I stopped taking sertraline of my own volition in September 2017 and haven't been back to the Dr.
Since November 2017 my mood has been very low. I am tired all of the time. I struggle to find any enjoyment in life. I drank alone on Saturday night and in my desperation to have someone to talk to, messaged some friends and acquaintances with incoherent ramblings. I am embarrassed, ashamed and a little scared of my lack of control.
I don't know if I want to try medication again and I don't know if I want to use the alcohol service..i have a hard time talking to my friends or family about my feelings and I'm just looking for a bit of support and encouragement to make changes to get to feeling better.
Thanks for reading