Hi, Im new here. I dont really know what to do ....im a mess and i know that.
Ive withdrawn from everyone (my marriage ended nearly 2 years ago). I go to work go home and thats it. I cant stand the thought of socialising. Sometimes i actually feel happy like i might be getting out of this mess...then bang im back in a dark place where my mind wont rest..sometimes my mind is racing that much i can struggle to talk. To even get my words out.
My only peace comes when i drink. It makes things quiter even though i know it makes things worse the next day...and i know i am drinking way too much.
Ive been trying to manage this alone for a very long time now....i think ive failed and im at rock bottom. No confidence..no self esteem...forcing myself to eat because im never hungry..irritable...angry..sad...overthinking everything.
Petrified to see a doctor...even though i need help