Search

Support Forum

SANE Support Forum

Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

If it makes you smile...
mihaela
Posts: 1073
Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2016 12:42 am
Location: Lancashire and Moldova

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby mihaela » Fri Feb 03, 2017 12:10 pm

Time has temporarily stood still for the jolly band encamped on the M3.1 for the next instalment of the Epic Saga™ is apparently waiting E nur Ji or anyone else who dares to contribute. Tex's patience is fast approaching breaking point, but due to the prevailing time warp is unable to break, and is thus held in abeyance - trapped like a fly in amber, or indeed, an asp in aspic.

Talking of asps...

Meanwhile back in the bucolic backwater of Snailshore (Salop) things were stirring in Macpelah, the packed, stuffy chapel of the Primitive, Strict and Particular Quivering Brethren* where the Right Reverend Abel Stingviper's guest preacher, the Very Reverend Doctor R**. McGeddon, strode purposefully and piously up to the pulpit to deliver a searing sermon upon the evils of tea-leaf reading in Moldova, and the wanton waywardness of popular Wild West fiction.

*The PSPQB being the unreformed, hardline, traditionalist, breakaway faction of the SPQB (otherwise known as the UHTBFSPQB. Note that a dissenting sub-faction within the PSQPB/UHTBFSPQB insists on using the faux-acronym UHTBFPSPQB - pronounced as spelt. The difference may seem academic to non-members but it's crucially crucial to the Brethren, meaning the difference between a rosy future of eternal bliss, harp plucking and celestial choirs, or a somewhat less pleasant one of eternal woe, teeth gnashing and arduous furnace stoking chores.
** Rabindranathus.

andthistoomustpass
Posts: 1637
Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2016 11:02 pm

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby andthistoomustpass » Sat Feb 04, 2017 2:49 pm

The lemmings were doing what to Renuță!? :shock:

Smelling money, Esmerelda paused at the clip clopping of well trained hooves as a beautiful fairytale carriage pulled by four gorgeous, but haughty looking, white horses with plumes on their heads and silver bells on their bridles emerged from the bend and drew to a halt beside the friends.

The coachman, elegant in silken morning dress and a powered wig, announced in a deep and authoritative voice; "All hail her Royal Highness, Princess Prunzeal, descendent of Eleanor of Aquitaine, heir to the throne of Padania, delicate and beautiful edelweiss of the Alps."

Rancid glowered with professional jealousy at the perfect presentation and delivery of his counterpart as the coachman produced a polished trumpet and blew a fanfare to accompany the footman opening the carriage's gilded door.

'Watcha!" said the shaven headed teenage girl, oozing confidence and vitality, who hopped out of the carriage, her black leather jacket and steel toecap Doc Martens complementing the oil stained jeans and grubby white t-shirt.

Tex's eye started to twitch as he realised the presence of the princess would further delay the fortune telling promised six weeks previously.

The French lemmings continued behaving, as French lemmings apparently do, with the absence of shame or decorum.

andthistoomustpass
Posts: 1637
Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2016 11:02 pm

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby andthistoomustpass » Tue Apr 04, 2017 11:49 pm

...Meanwhile Rex was stood on his hind legs, arms crossed and foot tapping as he waited impatiently for Mistress Mihaela to return from the park. ;)

mihaela
Posts: 1073
Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2016 12:42 am
Location: Lancashire and Moldova

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby mihaela » Sun Apr 16, 2017 7:52 pm

Mistress Mihaela at long last returned from the park, somewhat disshovelled - carrying a laiden basket, and on Easter Sunday, as it so happened. She had dug it up from a rose bed and left her spade behind.

"Hristos a înviat!" she exclaimed excitedly, as was the custom in them there parts, and from her basket she gave each of her friends an egg, dyed red with wild rose petals, after brushing off the soil.

"Unsere henne ist dabei ein Ei zu legen", announced the spy suspiciously, as he disembarked from a passing horse-drawn Trabant.
"What spy?" I hear you all ask in chorus. You may well ask.

"The East German spy, Helmut", replied the raccoon knowledgably - for the spy himself knew no Englisch. "He's a late great fan of the late, great Franzl Lang", yodeller extraordinaire".

And with that, Mihaela fell into an impromptu reverie, for she needed thyme to gather her thoughts after her lengthyish absence.

Only Time will tell how just much thyme she needed.
Last edited by mihaela on Mon Apr 17, 2017 7:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

andthistoomustpass
Posts: 1637
Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2016 11:02 pm

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby andthistoomustpass » Mon Apr 17, 2017 8:31 am

Having received notification via electronic carrier pigeon I've come to witness MiHa's return. I look forward to meeting Helmut and the connection with yodelling. Is yodelling a medium for encoding messages, does it simply remind Helmut of the ineffective lullabies of his dear but confused and over eager mutter? I await the answer with baited breath (never understood that saying, does it mean I've been eating flies?)

mihaela
Posts: 1073
Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2016 12:42 am
Location: Lancashire and Moldova

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby mihaela » Tue Apr 18, 2017 4:25 pm

I look forward to meeting Helmut and the connection with yodelling.
No doubt the entire civilised world looks forward - with mass baited breath and weary eyes. Look forward a little longer, for Mihaela is still lost in reverie, and I'm just standing in for her... Actually I'm sitting out.
Is yodelling a medium for encoding messages?
Yes and no, close but not close enough, near but far. To clarify, it cunningly enables Helmut to be identified amidst the warbles, morse, chatter and static by his shadowy friends, while at the same time inspiring them with patriotic lullabies from the mutterland,
Does it simply remind Helmut of the ineffective lullabies of his dear but confused and over eager mutter?
He is nostalgic both for the Ardelean floare de colţ of his youth, and for his half-crazed mama who, in 1971, fell into a trance in her asylum grounds on seeing a statue of the Blessed Virgin blink. Sadly, she is yet to come round, and will only do so when she gives birth to the future Yodelling Messiah.
I await the answer with baited breath (never understood that saying, does it mean I've been eating flies?)
You've now got your answer, and can swallow the bait. (Not flies - juicy maggots).

andthistoomustpass
Posts: 1637
Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2016 11:02 pm

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby andthistoomustpass » Thu Apr 20, 2017 12:47 am

HallelujahYayTeeHoo!

mihaela
Posts: 1073
Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2016 12:42 am
Location: Lancashire and Moldova

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby mihaela » Fri Apr 21, 2017 6:37 am

Meanwhile, in Domnișoară Mihaelă's absence, Helmut made his preparations. He took out a 1960s vintage tape recorder from the boot of his 1960s Trabby, lugged another piece of 1960s wizardry into a nearby bush, attached various leads, and plugged everything into a conveniently-placed hidden mains socket. The aerial wire led high into the branches of a tall tree. Lastly, he plugged in a microphone, clicked some switches and waited for the valves to warm up. Once he'd adjusted a meter till the needle hit the stop, and the magic eye shone green, at precisely 13.30pm he pulled a lever with a clunk and the squeaky reels began to revolve.

In no time the drowsy Gagauzian landscape was awakened from its slumbers with the dulcet tones of Franzl Lang yodelling at his best. Helmut patriotically cranked up the volume, and joined in the singing with Gusto, pet-name of his German shepherdess, Brunhilde - who enthusiastically howled in a canine imitation throughout.

For those yodelling afficionados who are interested in the finer details, and I'm sure you all are, the songs were: 1. Der Böller-Schütz von Mittenwald; 2. [i]Der Königsjodler; 3. A Feder am Huat; 4. Fensterljodler; (A relaxing interlude within an interlude followed, in which Helmut read out mind-numbing strings of five-figure groups in German, addressed to a few friends of his); 5. Hochzeitsjodler; and, next but not least or last, 6. an unidentified yodelling song with much bier-keller roistering and lederhosen slapping; and rounding off with a fine rendition of, 7. Mein Gruß für Dich. These last three were each interrupted by several cryptic announcements made by our suspicious host, each repeated twice to ensure his henchman got the message:

Helmut gruesst Franz! Helmut gruesst Franz!
Guten Tag!
Die Groessen 26 bis 32 passen mir gut.
Die Sonne scheint herrlich.
Unsere Henne ist dabei, ein Ei zu legen.


To clarify:

Helmut salută Franz! Helmut salută Franz!
Bonjour!
Mărimile de la 26 la 32 se potrivesc bine.
Soarele strălucește frumos
Găina noastră va pune în curând un ou.


In case that's not clear enough, to further clarify:

Helmut greets Franz! Helmut greets Franz!
Bună ziua!
The sizes 26 to 32 fit me well.
The sun is shining beautifully.
Our hen is about to lay an egg.


The last repeat ended reassuringly with "Alles Gute! Auf Wiederhoeren!" - which roughly translates as "All the best! Catch ya l8er!"

With the last joyous "Yaaah hee!" of Mein Gruß für Dich a sudden silence reigned over the sultry sun-drenched scene for a full 19 seconds, while the gathered throng sensibly gathered their senses together (in an untidy pile). The silence was so silent that they could hear, like a cartload of pins being dropped, the loud schkitterischischk of countless sunflower seeds dropping en masse from their heads - the combined after-effect of Helmut's enthusiastic dancing boots, the ceaseless slapping of lederhosen, and Gusto-Brunhilde's memoriable performance.

"Hearken to that loud schkitterischischk of countless sunflowers seeds dropping en masse", opined Tex as he turned down the volume on his Texas Instruments ® hearing trumpet.

mihaela
Posts: 1073
Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2016 12:42 am
Location: Lancashire and Moldova

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby mihaela » Sun Apr 23, 2017 9:22 am

Interlude (continude)

It just so happened that two aspiring and perspiring young singers, Ilinca Levcenco and Anastasia Bacila were making a short cut running through a field of maize on their way back from the Comrat Wine Festival. Anastasia was humming that old favourite Moldova mea while Ilinca was yodelling Ardelean Show, when they heard the amaizing sound floating across the crackling maze. "Suffering Steinzeugkrugs!" If it's not authentic Tyrolean jodelling!", exclaimed Ilinca, yodelleuse extraordinaire ardeleasca. "So it is" replied Anastasia, Gagauzia's famous ministar, with much less enthusiasm.

Inspired by the music, the girls sang Cowboy Sweetheart and Gagauzia simultaneously, Ilinca's yodelling harmonising perfectly with Anastasia's soft Russian vowels - except that she was singing in Gagauzian.

Nearly meanwhile, in 1971, in a dingy attic room, far away in a country that shall remain nameless, sat an shady individual who, for personal reasons, will similarly remain nameless, but whose code-name was Franz. She, for she was actually a woman, was a young foreign student studying for a degree in espionage at an enemy university. Hunched over a cheap portable radio she checked the time - 11.30am, plugged in earphones and tuned around a certain spot on the dial listening for a certain type of music. The short-wave band was crowded with stations of all kinds, not to mention static, whistles and crackles. Eventually, she found what she was looking for - yodelling (hidden among a nest of pirates talking about the English weather and Knitmaster knitting machines).

andthistoomustpass
Posts: 1637
Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2016 11:02 pm

Re: Story Links version 2 ( Sentences )

Postby andthistoomustpass » Tue Apr 25, 2017 11:05 pm

Franz wondered why her lettered country of residence insists on remaining Nameless. What was it called before she wondered? Why have all references been removed from the historical texts she has poured tea over in the university library? "I didn't use that old Nokia anyway." she consoled herself. Why Nameless? she further pondered. "Something is very fishy." Franz whispered wonderingly to the wind. "Sorry. That will be the haddock ." Apologised Willkommenia, her accommodating but wind generating room-mate.


Return to “Smiley Room”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests