I sat watching cowboy films with my dad. I was fascinated by the Indians. I wanted a totem pole. I wanted to live in a wigwam but most of all I liked the clothes they wore and the feather head dresses.
Later when I went out to play the other children asked who wanted to play cowboys and Indians.
“Me” I said “I want to be an Indian”
Of course the other children opted to be cowboys and ran after me throwing stones at my head.
That night I was crying myself to sleep staring at my Diddy men wallpaper when I heard a voice in my head. A soothing voice telling me not to cry and that I was a good girl and was going to heaven when I died. The voice told me to ignore the bullies and they would get their come up pence one day.
The next day I told my mum, she started going hysterical
“for Gods sake don’t tell anybody they will lock you up for life”
I thus learned to “Think” back to the voices and to mention them to nobody.
I was about six years old when my Grandma died. The next evening I saw her stood at the foot of my bed. I screamed.
“Sorry for frightening you” said the apparition and it disappeared
My mum came rushing upstairs “what’s up?” she asked
“I saw grandma” I said breathlessly
“Grandma won’t hurt you” said mum stroking my hair
“I don’t want to see dead people” I cried.
Years later I started training as was then the now impoliticly correct field of mental handicapped nursing. One day I was walking to the staff club when a little old lady stopped me
“Cross my palm with silver” she said.
I gave her fifty pence “I only want good news” I said
“You’re going to get letters from somewhere near America...Canada” she said
Then she continued “I know you said only give you good news but you’re going to become psychic as you get older”
I told her about screaming at the apparition of grandma stood at the foot of my bed.
“Your going to start speaking to spirit” she warned “be careful these psychiatrists removed part of my brain. It doesn’t stop me being psychic but it’s affected me badly in other ways. That part of my brain they removed had a purpose you know”
I was later to learn that the operation was called a frontal lobotomy. Thankfully psychiatrists have realised they don’t work and they no longer use this procedure.”
A few months later my sister announced that she was emigrating to Canada and yes she sent me letters.
Brockhall closed and I was working for social services. One night I went out for a drink when someone spiked my drink in a pub. My parents took me to a doctor who sent me to a psychiatric hospital. I signed myself in fearful that I would do something stupid. However that was it they had me. The chemicals they pumped me with made me hallucinate and I was in three months.
Later having been released and I was still hallucinating. Then somebody told me to throw the pills in the bin. I did I stopped hallucinating and soon I was back to work.
Then strange things started happening. I had daydreams from being a child but I started having visions were light bulbs talked to me and I saw spirit
I was in and out of hospital for years. The psychiatrists kept saying I was delusional and needed anti psychotic medication. I kept weaning myself of the medication and getting back to work.
I was later to discover I had a demon attached to me. He came to me in many forms manly as people I knew that were still alive like male psychiatrists and you tube stars I had a soft spot for. He also came to me as a telepathic alien called Jeremy. His aim seemed to be to try and get me to sign some sort of contract. He kept flirting with me disguised as different handsome gentlemen trying to get me to sign a marriage contract. Jeremy the alien kept trying to get me to sign a contract for a spaceship. I was in and out of hospital. Then came the 2007 act which entitles psychiatrists to section you for your own health. They sectioned me to force me to take the medication and I lost my job.
The demon started coming to me disguised as a handsome vampire and chasing me around my flat. He kept asking if I wanted to be his hunting hag or his bride.
For years I had been writing as a hobby . Now I had more time on my hands I managed to finish my book Acting Daft and get it published at www. chipmunkapublishing.co.uk (a mental health charity). I didn’t make any money but it helped my self esteem that I was now a published author.
The vampire kept telling me I would make more money from his publishing company and kept pushing contracts in my face. Of course I refused to sign.
I moved back to Chorley. I got my second book published “vampire asylum” The vampire helped me to write it. The demon kept giving me visions to get me into trouble. He seemed to be trying to make me rush out of the house without my keys so I would get locked out. Eventually he managed it and I was sectioned again for months.
In 2011 I was in bed when I heard the sound of an ambulance pulling up in the close. I started panicking had they come to section me again? The demon came and took me into a vision. I started to keep a diary. I was sectioned again .The psychiatrists insisted I go on injections. The injections were stressing me out terribly as I am frightened of needles the demon continued to give me visions about aliens invading.
Eventually I was taken off my community treatment order and I started to refuse the injections . I changed the names in my diary and had it published on kindle and by feed a read. “spider fairy’s dairy”. However I was worried about getting sectioned again so I rung a psychic.
The psychic said I should get rid of the demon by thinking of a pyramid. I was frightened. Even although the demon was getting me into trouble I felt I may become suicidal without him.
The psychic said “If you get rid of the demon nice spirit will come through”
That night the demon was annoying me. He kept showing himself as a policeman called Leroy and waving at me from inside a painting saying “I love you”, so I thought of a pyramid. The demon started to scream “How dare you throw a pyramid at me after all I’ve done for you”
His arm was coming out of the wall and for several moments I was very frightened. Then he disappeared.
My Grandma appeared and said “I’m proud of you everything will be alright now.”
I still see spirit in fact I have a healing nun that comes to help me when I am ill. The onward Christian soldiers visit me as referred to in my book. They keep saying I am their Queen and they are giving my enemy’s nightmares. However I am hoping that the troublesome demon is gone forever.
I have been referred for psychological therapy and the nurses are coming every evening to watch me swallow my oral medication. I know I cannot convince them that the demon is gone.
I have had another book published “hearing voices handbook” available on kindle and I have an Etsy shop were I am hoping to sell my paintings and I have a you tube account Ladybard2012.
I am hoping to do a distance learning course in Parapsychology and dream analysis. I am currently working on a sort of auto biography called Dancing with demons also on a sequel to Vampire asylum. I love creating eccentric characters and predicting how they would react in certain situations.
I don’t know if I will get sectioned again as they have all sorts of things that indicate you are becoming “poorly”. However I think in the past it has been the antics of the demon that have gotten me into trouble. I have renewed hope for my future. I would just like to thank psychic Jim for teaching me the pyramid trick.
Spider fairy’s dairy and my other books are available on kindle reader. Spider fairy’s diary is also available in paperback from feedaread.co.uk soon to be out on Amazon.
Amanda Jayne Maclachlan
NB My book Vampire Asylum is published by the name Amanda Maclachlan. I started adding my middle name after learning a porn star called Amanda Maclachlan had brought out an auto biography. Lol.