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A fallen soldier
Posted by Chalky
10th Oct 2014

So I'm really not very good at this stuff. But then again I suppose a depressive would say that wouldn't they?
Either way, I'll try my best.

My name is Pete. I'm on the right side of 30 (just about) and I'm in the Royal Air Force. Technically my job title is IT Technician but that's about as accurate as calling myself a Jockey. Basically my job is to take a big vehicle full of communications kit, drive it out to the middle of nowhere and set it up the guys with guns can talk to the officers and the officers can access facebook. But more about work later.

So more about work (I didn't say how much later). I first started to think something wasn't quite right when I was working as a member of the security team at the London 2012 Olympics. I was on the security lanes vetting and searching people to stop the bad guys from making the Olympic park into a giant crater. I spent most of my time on the VIP lanes so seeing the rich and famous was common place. I found that I just didn't care when someone famous walked through (especially Boris Johnson). Everyone else was going crazy and I just couldn't have cared less. I felt no happyness or joy. In fact I felt pretty damn miserable. I wasn't able to get joy from anything, I wasn't interested in things I used to be interested in. I found myself losing my temper pretty quick and would have thoughts about causing fights for no reason. Given that the place was full of Royal Marins and Mebers of the parachute regiment this would have definitely been a bad move.

After a few weeks of this I thought I'd best see the doc. This was no easy task. It had crossed my mind that something could be wrong with the old noggin and if that was the case then what did that mean? What would happen with my career? Would I be a mental?

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