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Notes Towards The Voyage From Me To You
Posted by John Garth Raubenheimer
30th Nov 2012

It's a cold clear day here in the Dales. In the distance you can see snow on the hills - mountains they call them here - of the Lake District.

My original "Voyage" was poems and a diary I kept, in which I recorded page after page, my conversation with God. I now think of it as a blend of wishful thinking and psychosis. Some of what I remember is mysterious to me and best forgotten. But the important thing is, keeping that diary gave me hope. THAT much, I think, is God-given.

On a day very much like today, while walking through Berea in Johannesburg, I dropped the all notebooks of of my diary - but not my poems - into a rubbish-bin. "Go back! Go back!" shrilled the voice |I had been listening to for so long. I answered, "If there's any truth in what you've been saying, you can tell it to me again."

These days my voices are angry and persecutory. I ignore them. Sometimes, usually in the morning when I am fresh out of dreaming, they catch me when my guard is till down, and I get upset. I don't "hear" voices. These are like silken thoughts, disruptive, completely contrary to my "normal" thinking. Very unpleasant. Oh well.

I hope today turns out as nice as this for you. But we can't choose our weather, can we?

Take care, please... John.

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