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Lost confused hurt person seeking.....
Posted by S.I.S
28th Sep 2012

... Comfort from willing listener?

Well that is just one simple way I guess I would start to describe myself if I was placing an advert in a lonely hearts column, but I'm not entirely sure I would get much interest, which is exactly how I'm thinking this may go down. More to the point, im not placing any such advert. I'm new to blogging, but NOT new to writing or the black dog itself. Today I have finally bitten the bullet and have decided that rather than just have dozens of note pads filled with thoughts, feelings, poems and just scribbles in general, that I would put them out there in public domain, albeit anonymously!! From my point of view writing has always been a great aid in actually getting some of the thoughts out of my head. Things that seem to be so hard to talk about but some how become easier when they are written down. Maybe if we don't say them out loud they are not true and we don't have to face them, maybe just writing things down can momentarily make us feel better and from my experience, it is best to grab any time like that, no matter how minimal because that is a peaceful place that is safe and secure. I haven't found many other places like that.

And so, I am going to start writing down some thoughts and the experiences I have been through and continue to go through. I appreciate that I am one of many millions that is suffering from a mental health problem. I am no expert in it, in the sense I have no qualifications in psychology, psychiatry, medicine etc but I have lived with it for 20+ years and that counts for something. All walks of life, different degrees of educated people will suffer from MH problems but when it comes down to it, we will all experience similar thought patterns, processes and behaviours. We not only have our personal challenge of coming to terms and understanding the illness, but the massive public stigma that is attached to all things relating to mental health. All of these things are time consuming and energy sapping. So, today I thought I would give a bit of an introduction to what my plans are over the forthcoming weeks in terms of blogging. I'm going through a lot of things right now that I am finding hard to process. When my mind is raging I grab a pen or the laptop and start let my mind do the talking. It's a blank canvas that gets filled very quickly. By me getting it out there I hope that I can manage to at least reach one person - even if that person is myself. If I write things and that helps me, you, families or anyone - then It is worth putting myself in the vulnerable position. I am fully aware that there could be consequences to this, especially with someone with a delicate mind, but I can't bottle it up for much longer. And so, I see there are many themes on current live blogs but I'm going to start with the one that is forefront of my mind at the moment, and that's suicide and the way it becomes attractive and comforting to someone when they are low in moods.

So, position of interest exposed. Back soon.

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