Poem: An Unwanted Intruder
I lay there asleep, in peace on my bed
Avoiding waking to confront the demon in my head
Losing myself in my beautiful dreams
Feeling free, well, for what it seems
I wake and feel the constraint around me
Face to face with the monster that has found me
Reeling out a list of rules I should follow
Each with a meaning that seems so hollow
But as I do one, it makes me do more
If I ever missed one, it would yell as it saw
I obeyed every rule, scared of upsetting it
It knew it could own me, and I was letting it
Drained and tired from doing what it desired
I was the personal slave it had hired
So consumed in the rituals I had to do
I was losing everything else that once was true
My freedom was jailed
Imprisoned in a hell I hailed
Watching my loved ones fall apart beside me
It was time I set light to the fire inside me
This presence was my enemy, not my friend
And a relationship that I needed to end
I burnt my bridges and cut my ties
I ripped it apart and said my Goodbyes
I have the freedom now to live my life and be free
But over my shoulder, it’s always watching me
Its shadow lingers at a distance
And whispers to me in its persistence
But I stand strong, you will stay a ghost, and I will walk past your existence.
—
Taken from Hope Through Poetry by Samatha Crilly
