Daily Diary October 10th 2019
Posted by darkana1999
10th Oct 2019

Hey everyone.

Feeling really low today.

I was able to not eat anything until dinner, where I had 5 chicken nuggets and 2 yorkshire puddings. I felt so guilty when I ate! I had to though because my boyfriend was in the room with me. I hate myself. I'm so FAT! I may have to purge later once he's asleep.

We have a long journey to Cornwall tomorrow so that will be a chance to not eat for most of the day. I'm terrified incase i'm faced with eating infront of people I don't know. I can always go and purge later on though.

My depression has really taken a hold of me. I didn't self harm yesterday and for some reason I felt guilty for it! It's almost like when I don't do it, i'm even more worthless...

I've come to realise that I am addicted to watching documentaries about mental health. I'm currently watching Don't Call Me Crazy. It's a UK documentary about young people on a psychiatric ward in the UK. I watched a film called To The Bone on Netflix too which is about a girl in America with an eating disorder.

I think that will be all for today,
See ya x

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