Kieran's words to describe mental illness
Posted by Admin
12th Apr 2019

The family of Kieran Hubbard, who took his own life in February 2019, wanted us to share this text message he sent to his father, explaining his mental health problems. Kieran's family hope by sharing this text message more people will understand the severity and complexity of mental illness.

"I feel paralysed and an overwhelming sense of fear. It sounds ridiculous to anybody that doesn't suffer with mental health, but I wouldn't wish it on anyone. It completely takes over you, mentally and physically. It's like a complete state of trauma and you can't speak, feel an urge to cry, too scared to be with anyone but not wanting to be alone, feeling lost about what to do or how to do it. Feeling in a daze and simultaneously being unaware but also aware of everything around you. Struggling to control your breathing either rapidly inhaling or just forgetting to breath at all until you gasp. Frustration that turns to anger but wanting to hide rather than confront. It's horrible.

"You want to stay in bed and escape but then you fear what other people are thinking if you don't act normal, this continues until either you just give up through exhaustion or collapse and fall asleep. It's draining and people wonder why you're always tired."

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