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life condemned
Posted by poecilotheria
24th Aug 2011

Although most of us that have problems in mental health have to face it on a day to day basis just hoping that the next day will be different, we try not to let the problems rule us and make everyday existence become just about the problems.

Alot of the time we as a whole are mis understood or rejected for a multiple of reasons and does not help to shine a little hope on things but rather push things deeper making it even harder to crawl out.

For a long time I have struggled through things that seemed to be beyond hope or effected by mental health like my music,its very tough to learn music with all sorts going on in your head, having trouble remembering what you have already learnt. Everyday life is effected in a number of ways to each of us differently but the results are pretty much the same... the thoughts and feelings of having a life thats not right for how we want or want it to be its difficult to change things that need a bit more attention and focus to deal with so we slip back into the pit we started.

I have found alot in life has been restricted or more selective of people that have a better mental health status but does this make us any different or less worth than other people without the problems? there is alot to be said about how the world views people with mental health difficulties how society looks down at us rather than straight at us.

If i ever had the choice to go back and change things I would go back to the last biggest mistake i had made that was being rediscovered, i spent time in sessions and therapy settings then i dropped off the radar for a few years altered my name never sought help for any problem even medical i stayed well away from being discovered until i slipped up under stress and was rediscovered but if i could make the choice i would have never been seen like this, mental health is something that effects the whole of life not just its parts and i hate it and wish i could change everything to be happy to smile and laugh to socialise and blend in with people but its never meant to be, as it always has been there seems to be only one door that is inevitable and its not the one i had hoped for.

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