Posted by Lilly-ann
16th Jul 2011

hey... so here i am... sitting in bed thinking whats the point?! lying here just staring at the 4 walls that are my prison but my safe place too... lol... at the mo i am thinking should i get something to eat or just leave it...

Im so lost and low... there nothing i can do about it... i have psych next week but with another one i dont even know! because apparently i am a "danger" to myself because of the thoughts in my head... but they are normal arnt they??... to think about suicide and death all the time... when you are out you are looking at where/how you could do your next attempt... it not long since my last suicide attempt... and tbh i am still feeling crap from that... my family hates me and look at me as if i do not belong here... like i belong somewhere else locked up away from everyone else on this place call earth!!... i know when i am not wanted!

since my brother commited suicide it has changed the family forever... my family believe that it is my fault and that i am not human!... i am a monster... they are right cos i feel there is something inside me that is not "human" like i dont belong here!... and my gosh they are sooooooooooooo right!

anyway time for a fag break...xx

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