you may recognise this
Posted by Spiderman1
23rd May 2015

Hi everyone

I thought i would share with you information i recently found out about myself, it is not a diagnosis of your mental health condition, simply information sharing you may find useful, if you recognise what i experience

Trauma therapy
Its like the events that happened in my childhood, feels like it happened to me this morning, it plays like a constant loop.

The events in my childhood were to big for me to breakdown and assign to memory, this is trauma, the feelings i experience are flashbacks, they are memories that cannot hurt me

When i get distressed its like i get confused and everything around me feels unreal as if iwasn't there but watching it on tv,

What i am experiencing is dis association, my brain has gone into survival mode and the chemicals in my brain go to the survival part away from the front, the performing part

I feel like i am crying inside all the time, my insides are like a whirlwind, i feel overwhelmed
what i am experiencing is severe depression and anxiety (severe is the score or rating) from the form that is used

I fear people, places and making mistakes, i sweat, just want to get away, i can't take things in, i feel like i am shaking
What i am experiencing is panic

I have very dark thoughts, they are very powerful and frightening
What i am experiencing is intrusive thoughts

I found the information from the trauma therapist very useful, at least now i know what is happened and when,

before i used to ask myself "whats wrong with me" through the information i now know, i will need help to put a wellbeing plan together. Talking therapies have never given me such insight, talking about things, then see you sametime next week, does not get to the route of the problem. It helped at the time but with 30years of mental health difficulties i'm not convinced talking therapies works on its own.

I hope what i have learned and the information sharing is of some help

Kindest regards

Small steps, big changes

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